Films: Black Swan (2010)

(Film Content Warnings: Disordered Eating, Mental Health, Suicide, Self-harm, Sexual Assault, Blood, Murder, Violence, Sexual Content)

As an early teenager I was never really into films, until I met my current best friend and she introduced me to her favorite movie and her favorite actress, Black Swan starring Natalie Portman. Since then this film has held a special place in my heart.

Black Swan is a psychological thriller released in 2010 and directed by Darren Aronofsky. The plot revolves around Nina (Natalie Portman), a profesional ballet dancer in her mid twenties who is still living with her controlling mother, a retired dancer. Nina gets chosen to play the role of "Swan Queen" in Swan Lake, since she is beautiful, fragile and fearful, fitting the role of the White Swan perfectly. However, the Black Swan, spontaneous, sensual, risk-taking, is her total opposite. 

"He picked me, mommy! I'm the new Swan Queen!"

"Perfection is not just about control, it's also about letting go."

Nina battles with herself as she tries to become both the Black and White Swan, and through her search of perfection on the borderline between control and letting go, she cracks under pressure, losing herself as the Black Swan takes over. 

"It's the role isn't it? It's all this pressure? I knew it would be too much. I knew it!"

"I just want to be perfect."

"The only person standing in your way is you, it's time to let her go. Lose yourself."

"I felt it. Perfect. I was perfect."

Blessed be, 

-Rose

Films: Girl, Interrupted (1999)

(Content Warnings!! mentions of abuse, self-harm, eating disorders, mental illnesses, suicide attempt, descriptions/pictures of mental institution etc)

This has to be one of my favourite movies. I've seen it so many times that I can't quite remember how I first came across it, I do remember, however, that as soon I started watching it my eyes were glued to the screen.

Girl, Interrupted is a 1999 American Drama that follows the story of Susanna Kaysen's (Winona Ryder) 18 month stay in a mental institution during the 1960s. She checks herself in after a suicide attempt and was later on diagnosed with Bordeline Disorder. Based on the memoir by Susanna Kaysen of the same name, we explore the worlds of the sane and the insane in a time when the medical studies of the psyche are just beginning to bloom. 

There she meets Polly "Torch" Clark (Elisabeth Moss), a burn victim; Georgina Tuskin (Clea DuVall), a pathological liar; Daisy Randone (Brittany Murphy), a sexually abused girl who struggles with bulimia and self harm and Janet Webber (Angela Bettis), an anorexic. She is particularly enthralled by Lisa Rowe (Angelina Jolie), a sociopath who seems to run the place through her manipulation.
Along with her new friends Susanna discovers that there are liberties and comforts in the psychiatric hospital that she would never have access to in the normal world. Susanna growing comfortable with her new surroundings prolongs her stay in the ward. Will she be able to give up her new found liberties in order to continue her life in the world of the mentally sane?

I love this movie for a number of reasons, the first being that at the time I really related to the main character's struggles and fears. In other words, this movie really hit home. 

I could infinitely write about this movie, analysing every little detail, but I wouldn't want to bore you. So I will try to sum things up.

The movie, in my opinion, succeeds in portraying the alienation felt by an individual who does not follow society's set standards. It makes us question if it is this alienation that drives us to insanity, o whether it is society that labels us as insane. Either way we are forced to conform to these standards if we ever want to continue with our life. 

*Spoiler*

Either way we are forced to conform to these standards if we ever want to continue with our lives. Susanna discovers that the key element in her recovery was herself. The hospital couldn't cure you, it could only aid your recovery. Once Susanna decided that she wanted to recover and came to terms with societies standards, was she able to heal and move on with her life.

"Declared healthy, and sent back into the world. My final diagnosis "a recovered borderline". What that means I still don't know. Was I ever crazy? Maybe. Or maybe life is."

Blessed be,

~Rose